What makes us happy in life?

Marc Schulz and Robert Waldinger, An 85-year Harvard study found the No. 1 thing that makes us happy in life: It helps us ‘live longer’,  CNBC, Feb 10, 2023.

Contrary to what you might think, it’s not career achievement, money, exercise, or a healthy diet. The most consistent finding we’ve learned through 85 years of study is: Positive relationships keep us happier, healthier, and help us live longer. Period. 

 In our relational lives, there are seven keystones of support:

1. Safety and security: Who would you call if you woke up scared in the middle of the night? Who would you turn to in a moment of crisis? 
2. Learning and growth: Who encourages you to try new things, to take chances, to pursue your life’s goals? 
3. Emotional closeness and confiding: Who knows everything (or most things) about you? Who can you call on when you’re feeling low and be honest with about how you’re feeling? 
4. Identity affirmation and shared experience: Is there someone in your life who has shared many experiences with you and who helps you strengthen your sense of who you are?
5. Romantic intimacy: Do you feel satisfied with the amount of romantic intimacy in your life?
6. Help (both informational and practical): Who do you turn to if you need some expertise or help solving a practical problem (e.g., planting a tree, fixing your WiFi connection).
7. Fun and relaxation: Who makes you laugh? Who do you call to see a movie or go on a road trip with who makes you feel connected and at ease?